is therapy a toxic trend?

(Disclaimer: Ya’ll I am a huge advocate for mental health, and I am proud to go to therapy, so in no way am I condemning people who go to therapy. I believe in therapy, I support therapy, I participate in therapy. And just to make that abundantly clear, if my therapist is reading this: Hi! I’m still coming to therapy. We’ll talk all about why I wrote an article questioning the entire culture surrounding the thing you do for a living next week!)

Is it just me, or does it seem like everyone goes to therapy? Your sister goes to therapy, your aunt goes to therapy, your friend goes to therapy, your coworker goes to therapy, every influencer ever goes to therapy. So… how did we go from therapy being a taboo word to the fact that therapy could be a toxic trend?

Therapy used to be a huge stigma. No one talked about it. If you were walking into a therapist’s office and someone you knew saw you, I’m pretty sure you would get a plane ticket to the first place you could, change your name, and never speak to anyone ever again.

Okay, that might be a little extreme, but when I started thinking about wanting to see a therapist, people were shocked I was telling them this. (Disclaimer: I wasn’t going around telling everyone I knew, “Hey! I want to go to therapy! I just want to clarify that.)

If you went to therapy, the consensus that swirled around society was, “Oh my gosh, there is something seriously wrong with you,” and now, if you don’t go to therapy, society says, “Oh my gosh, there is something seriously wrong with you.”It’s a great thing that going to therapy is well received now, but it’s almost too well received.

Bear with me; we’re going to talk about TikTok because this app, I am certain, ruins and corrupts anything good. Why does every content creator, influencer, and brand ambassador think A.) everyone wants to hear what happened in their therapy appointment or B.) they are a licensed therapist and they can give people advice?

I swear, if I hear the sentences below one more time, I am deleting social media. (Okay, so also not really doing that because I’m an author for a living and I need to post my own content, so.)

My boss disagreed with me, so obviously I’m being gaslit.

Going out with friends is too triggering for me, and I need to protect my peace.

I can’t hold space for someone else’s emotions right now.

I need to protect my boundaries, so I cancelled meeting them for coffee.

Suddenly, the majority of reels are about boundaries, narcissists, trauma, triggers, cutting people off, protecting peace, etc., and these words and advice that are probably not coming from an actual therapist are pasted over a pretty sunset.

So, are we actually learning these concepts, or are we just learning the vocabulary?

Do we all need therapy, or are we doing it because influencers are telling us how good it is for our minds, souls, and hearts?

Is the popularity of therapy evidence that we’re taking our mental health seriously, or has therapy become another cultural trend?

Toxic has become the internet’s favorite adjective.

Everyone wants to diagnose everyone ( “he’s a narcissist”, “that’s an anxious attachment style”, “they’re emotionally unavailable”).

Boundaries have become an excuse to avoid people, and a way to make it seem like we’re doing something healthy for ourselves.

Protecting our peace is literally another word for “I don’t want to talk about it, notice it, or hear about it.”

Every little bump in the road with a co-worker, friend, or family member becomes a diagnosis.

Trauma and PTSD are words thrown around in every sentence.

Is therapy trendy now? Absolutely!

Why is therapy trendy now?

Because trendy sells, trendy gets you more followers. These content creators know just what they’re doing. Everyone wants to be therapized (I’m making that a word if it’s not). An easy way to access therapy is to scroll past it before you fall asleep, and if it gives you the answer you secretly want or are looking for, you’ll give it a like, a follow, or a save, and boom, you just helped a content creator, and you feel good because you got the answer you WANT but might not need.

“Your relationship might be complicated (and it might be because of you)” is not going to get the follows, likes, and views.

But

“7 signs your best friend is secretly a narcissist” absolutely will.

When you engage with these posts, you are not paying out of pocket; you hear what you want to hear, and it only takes five minutes.

So, does that make therapy a toxic trend? No, because what people on the internet are feeding other people on the internet is not therapy; it’s complicated concepts being used as one-liners and psychological teachings being turned into pretty reels. And maybe the bigger picture is we’re really not talking about therapy at all; we’re masking the reasoning for ghosting people, not liking certain people, flaking on outings and commitments with therapy language to protect our image.

Let’s keep talking about therapy; let’s keep talking about depression, anxiety, seeking help, and talking about mental health. But let’s stop labeling our bad habits and patterns as therapy terms, treating discomfort as a boundary we have to set, and labeling everyone.

Please keep going to therapy; just maybe don’t let TikTok be your therapist.